Burning Man

My Story:

I have a profound need to actively engage in my own life. Whatever the hell that means. I am a doer. When I gain knowledge of something that interests me, I think, “Let’s go. Let’s do this.” I struggle with ‘someday people.’ I am the type of person that if someone says to me, “I have always wanted to go to Thailand,” I respond with, “Let’s pull out our calendars.” If that person looks at me sideways and simply says, “I’ll go someday,” you can bet money, they will never go. I heard about Burning Man from a friend. He tried explaining it to me; he tried showing me pictures. I still didn’t get it, but I wanted to. I kept looking at pictures and reading blogs on fire dancers and costuming. I thought this is something I need to do, to feel I have experienced the full range of life.

I have had the privilege of attending Burning Man twice. I went 2015 and 2016. Both burns were completely different experiences. As the point of this blog is to help inspire doing something for this first time, I will focus on my first burn.

The story of my first burn began in August 2015. I had started dating a man, let’s call him EDH. I had gone on three dates with EDH at the time, and I sat across from him quietly picking at my drink. “Have you heard of Burning Man?” I asked. “I think I am just going to go.” He gasped several times. He told me how he had wanted to go to Burning Man for over a decade. I smiled and said, “I’ll have to tell you about it when I get back.” I wanted this trip for me. I wanted to experience this on my own.

My first burn fell together so easily. I obtained a ticket (and didn’t get scammed) and accommodations came together for me in an RV. I went out and bought outrageous costumes, I joined multiple facebook groups, and I still had no idea what to expect.

I made the drive to Black Rock City with my car loaded up and butterflies in my stomach. I was greeted at the gates with a bear hug by a dust-covered man wearing only a kilt. He scanned my ticket and told me, ‘welcome home.’ Through those gates, I went on to have one of the most meaningful experiences of my life. Every morning, I got up and rode my bike onto to the playa. I stopped at various tents and talked to people giving away coffee and wanting nothing in return. I rode my bike to the different works of art. Nights, I would ride from DJ to DJ dancing to music and meet new people. It was one of the most amazing and random experiences at the same time.

The most meaningful part of my first burn was my visit to the temple. The temple is a wooden structure. It is a solemn monument standing among the eclectic art. The temple is a quiet place for reflection. On the walls, you see tributes and memorials to people who have lost loved ones. I took a moment to write a note to my step-grandmother, in sharpie, on the walls of the temple. I told her I was sorry I didn’t try harder to visit her before she died. I then, sat alone under my writing and cried. I had never fully processed her death, or my guilt for denying her requests asking me to make the drive to El Dorado, Kansas to visit her one last time. As I cried, strangers came up and hugged me. One man looked at me and said, “I am just going to stand next to you, as a presence so you know you are not alone.” To me, that is burning man. That is radical inclusion. It isn’t the parting or the costumes; it is being accepted in your most honest form. I was sitting alone in the temple, wearing a rainbow-colored corset and matching tutu, bonding with strangers who wanted only to provide comfort in a moment of pain.

The majority of Burning Man is fun and games.  The city quickly becomes a community. Walking along the streets of Burning Man, I have stumbled across a full-on roller skating rink, twerking contests, dance parties and anything else the creative human mind can concoct. Last year a piece of a Boeing 747 was brought in and used as a lounge.  My favorite camp is near center point. Every morning a group of people come together and hand out freshly baked focaccia bread and mint tea. It is a place to relax and socialize. My favorite event every year is the French Toast and Lingerie party. Wear your favorite outfit and get served some yummy french toast.

Burning Man is a place for people to go out and be their most authentic self. It is amazing how natural it feels to dress in wild costumes and hop on and off wild artistic cars. I acclimated quickly to all of the quirkiness around me. Decompression, as it is called (coming home after burning man) can be a rough transition. You go from wearing clothing that makes you feel expressive, to wearing what the latest magazine tells is trending. After seeing people put so much time and energy into creating transportation illustrating their personality, you return to the real world of silver and white cars all looking the same. It can be a bit sad for people. That is why you will hear so many people refer to burning man as home. And from one burner to another I can tell you, there is no place like home.

Master of Burning Man:

David Bell is a veteran burner. He has burned 12 times and heads Camp Shrunken Heads. To prepare for my first burn, I joined a local facebook group and was quickly put in contact with David Bell.  When I asked David for his number one piece of advice is for a first-time burner he said, “Don’t worry about the bullshit, you can buy ice and melt it for water. Just get a ticket and get your butt down there. Mentally you have to be tough. People can be assholes in the desert just like in the city. It’s not nirvana. I always sleep inside my car. I had a spare tent, but it got run over by a drunken dinosaur.”

“Burning Man is no one thing. It is a self-fueled art expression festival. The point is seeing the people. We are all so fucking scared in life. In America, we are scared shitless. At Burning Man, you get to relax and play.” I asked him how he responded when people ask about the sex and drug aspect of Burning Man. “It definitely has a lot of adult shit. You aren’t going to be walking down the street and have someone ask you if you want drugs, but they are definitely there.”

*Please note that some pictures are from 2015 and others are from 2016

**Click here for Part 2: Burning Man for the First Timer

 

Camping with Kids

My Story:

The move to Northern California awoke within me a passion for the outdoors I never knew existed. I recall my first trip to Tahoe, the roads winding up through the mountains and my head out the window like a dog on the way to the park. I was in love. My new church had a camping group, and I remember standing at the kiosk after services as the leader of Bayside Adventure Sports told me about the fun, fellowship and communion with nature. At the time, it seemed like the empowering setting I was seeking.

I stood in Wal-mart looking at the various tents and sleeping bags, my preschooler pulling on my arm. She can’t handle 20 minutes in Wal-mart I thought to myself, how am I going to handle three days without SpongeBob to save me from her mood swings. I left Walmart overwhelmed and empty-handed.

The next day I searched online for what I should bring. I ran into extensive lists that included survival knives that could kill a bear and first-aid kits that could replace an ER. I pulled up Google maps. My campsite was less than 20 minutes from several restaurants and less than 15 minutes from a large grocery store. I am a single mom on a budget, and though it was tempting to purchase the travel trailer complete with a refrigerator I just wanted to know three things, what do I need, what do I want and what is being marketed to me that I do not need.

After talking to several people and figuring out some basics my little and I were ready to go. I watched in awe at how natural it was for my child, (frequently surrounded by electronic screens and plastic toys while constantly complaining of boredom) to be in nature. I put my phone away and watched my daughter and her new friends play with dirt, rocks, and sticks for hours until dinner time. The next day at the lake we arrived at 9 am, she happily played in the sand until we went home at 5. That night she escaped her sleeping bag and crawled into mine. She cuddled into me, and I held my child as we slept. In a house surrounded by ‘things to do,’ my child and I are more entertained by the wonders of nature. Some of my favorite moments as a mother are camping with my kid. I watch the girl I treat as oh so fragile, scale rocks, climb trees and roll in the dirt. I see her as more independent and capable. I fall in love with my child more and more every day but there is something about camping with her that also makes me fall in love with being her mother.

 A talk with a Master:

Erik Allen and his wife are lifelong campers. Erik works for a local camping ministry. He has guided several campers (including myself) on their first trip into the wilderness. He said, “A cool thing someone once told me in relation to bringing kids and doing things as a family in general” Start small, short, easy and often. As they get older, or when you decide to do a big trip, it won’t be such a shock. It will become just something that you do.”

Erik is a self-proclaimed ‘gear lover.’ He told me that you want to be sure to have insulation between the ground and yourself. He bought a cheap foam pad at Walmart for each member of his family to help keep warm at night. The pad goes under your sleeping bag. He told me he likes this better than an air mattress alone because ‘an air mattress doesn’t have insulating properties.’ He went on to say, ‘I love my 2-burner camping stove’. He suggests bringing pots and pans from home before investing in a camping set.

He wanted to impress the importance of camp etiquette. He told me once he was camping and his youngest was crying at night. They put on the portable DVD at 2 am and watched cartoons with him. He laughed and said he couldn’t believe he was watching TV at 2 am in a tent. But whatever works. People will understand when your kids are crying, but you still need to be respectful if they won’t stop. He suggested taking them for a car ride.

 Questions to ask yourself:

-Why are you camping? If you just want to try something new vs. you want to immerse yourself in nature be sure to take that into consideration. The joy of camping in Sugar Pine, Lake Tahoe is there is a grocery store 20 minutes away. In fact, not just a grocery store but also a casino, hotel, movie theater and anything else you could want. It is amazing to wake up in a tent and hike down the lake and back then drive to breakfast at Denny’s. You feel immersed but not isolated. If you are looking for an in-depth immersion into nature, perhaps backpacking is more up your alley. Just make sure you research local wildlife and necessary permits if any.

-Who are you camping with? For first-timers, I highly suggest linking up a group. I am lucky enough that my church started Bayside Adventure Sports. They do all the legwork and have a great staff to help with gear, and they even have gear they loan out if you want to try before you buy. Another great option is joining a meetup group. Check meetup.com to see if there is a camping group in your area. There you can look for locals that already know the area and perhaps are willing to let you join up on one of their trips. If you can’t get a group of friends do some research on popular places to camp in your area. Ask for a more populated area, so you are not isolated if you have questions.

-What is your fitness level? Are you interested in biking, hiking, kayaking? Be realistic. I have been on hikes with people that get in over their heads. You may drive up a mountain to get to your campsite and go on a downhill hike. Remember that you have to go back up that hill to get back to your tent.

-Is the site safe for kids? Camping right on the water is a romantic idea if you aren’t going to have to worry about your child running into the lake the entire time.  My favorite campsites are near the water but not right on the beach when camping with the kids.

Questions to ask others:

Make sure your desired lodging is accommodated. If you are bringing an RV or travel trailer, be aware some campsites may not have the required hookups.

At many National parks, you may need to book six months in advance as spots are in high demand. About 50% of campsites are first come first serve. If possible, scout out sites in advance. Go by yourself and note what site best serves your needs. (IE away from the dumpsters is nice, but also walking distance to bathrooms is a big plus). There is almost always an info board or kiosk with how to make reservations posted at the entrance to the park. It is always good to do a scouting trip.

Ask if there are toilets and showers and what your proximity will be?

Are there any rules unique to your campsite (i.e. regarding wildlife, alcohol, pets, etc.). Do not assume your pet will be allowed at the campground. Also, many campsites require the use of bear boxes. You will want to know the dimensions of the bear box before you arrive. My first time camping I brought an oversized cooler that would not fit in the bear box. It was a huge inconvenience to leave the campsite to drive to the store to find a smaller cooler. Call the site ahead of time tell the ranger station that you are a first-time camper and would simply like to know of anything they want to say to you in advance. The staff at the campsite is a great resource. They want you to be prepared. Be considerate and learn the rules.

Another helpful tip, clean and vacuum your car before you camp. Bears have very sensitive noses. Every season bears destroy cars trying to get in when they smell food.

 

What Gear should you get?

Splurge:

If you can borrow a tent for your first-time camping, then do so. If you are going to buy a tent, then I suggest splurge on the pop-up tent. It may cost a little more, but you will be glad you did so when you see others around you wrestling with those annoying little poles. Also, and I cannot stress this enough, SET THE TENT UP BEFORE YOU GO. You do not want to be stuck in the middle of nowhere and have the profound realization you are unable to set up your tent.

Needs:

Sleeping bag or air mattress AND a pad. (If you require a pump for the air mattress I suggest a foot pump as many campsites do not have an outlet for the electric pump). There are many sleeping bags out there. I camp in the summer usually at places like Tahoe. I have a $30 sleeping bag from Walmart, and it works great. Extreme temperatures or backpacking will require specialized sleeping bags.

LAYERS! I have camped Tahoe, Santa Cruz, Yosemite and Burning Man. Being outside you feel the fluctuations in temperature. I love baggy yoga pants over my shorts. Zip up hoodies help that transition from morning cold to afternoon heat. Erik noted that people often get holes burned into nice coats from a stray campfire spark. Be aware that fleece will melt. So around a campfire, he likes to stick with flannel and jeans.

Trash Bags!

GLOWSTICKS!!!- at night kids like to run around. I cover my child in glowsticks. So I can always spot her quickly in the mess of playing children.

Toys- Nerf football, Frisbee, if you are brave a slingshot (hey where else can they use one). My daughter has a big toy dump truck that is a camping favorite. She loads it up with dirt for hours

Cooking Stove. I have a small tailgate stove. It works great. But if you plan you can get away without cooking. Sandwiches, Lunchables (DIY or store bought) as well as prepackaged breakfast can save time and space. If you do want to cook, even a jet boiler can help you with premade stews and save on space.

Never forget a can opener.

Flashlights or lanterns

baby wipes (wipe down hands, face, surfaces)

 

Recipe:

When camping with kids I like do as much as I can ahead of time. My friend is a master at finding little cheats to save time during meals. He pre-scrambles his eggs and has most everything chopped and ready before he leaves the house. I have taken note, and one of my easy camping dishes is below.

Canned Tacos:

1 can black beans drained

1 can corn kernels drained

1 can rotell tomatoes

1 package taco seasoning

Mix ahead of time and put in a plastic container in your cooler.

Bring tortillas and shredded cheese. Simply heat up the taco mix and serve. Simple and quick.

 

Picture Frame Craft:

I love this because it is simple and allows the kids to create a keepsake from the trip.

In advance, you only need to buy some craft popsicle sticks and wood glue.

Have the kids glue the sticks in a square to create a picture frame. They can then use the glue to decorate the frame with rocks, shells, sticks, leaves, whatever they find meaningful to them.

I like to take fun pics and selfies and later glue them to the inside of the frame. Add magnets when you get home to put it on the refrigerator.